the first step is to admit you have a problem

Yesterday, I remembered a special moment that happened about a month ago. I was doing my weekly grocery shopping at ASDA, the ugly English step-sister of Wal-Mart, and through my iPod ear buds I heard the unmistakable falsetto of Justin Hawkins. I ripped off my headphones and sure enough, ASDA was playing The Darkness and it wasn't "I Believe In A Thing Called Love". I hummed along to "Love Is Only A Feeling" and squeaked out a few of the high notes when no one was around.

In the midst of those four minutes, I was drowned in a wave of The Darkness-related memories. Like that time John, Brian and I almost drove to Charlotte to see them live, except that it was a school night. And none of us could drive. Or that time Melissa and I went to the beach with the Wolfe family and I suggested we listen to The Darkness on the way, having forgotten that the chorus of the song "Get Your Hands Off My Woman" is just that, plus "Mother Fucker!". Good times.

On the walk back to my room I was thinking back on how good the first album by The Darkness is and the erosion of my appreciation for it based on social expectations over time. It's not just that The Darkness was a novelty band and the twenty-first century's answer to Spinal Tap. Bands like The Darkness get swept under the rug because their fans were teenage boys who have since developed their musical tastes to some varying degree of sophistication. At least that's what we'd like to think.

The thing is, we all have The Darkness moments: somewhat embarrassing musical tastes that we're afraid to bring up in retrospect. We don't want to lose cool points based on what we used to listen to. But what we listened to has always, to some degree, defined who we are. Music taste is a process that evolves from one artist to a better artist to an even better artist and so on. We'd all like to think our music appreciation now is top-notch, but haven't we always? Even though my music tastes have changed, in reality, I'm very much the same type of person that at one point thought The Darkness would take over the world with their leopard-print leotards. It is for this reason that I present this "Unashamed List of Guilty Musical Pleasures" (or "Good Blackmail Material"):

• My first concert I went to was 'N Sync with my sister. I think everyone there but me was a girl that enjoyed screaming. I hated it. But I did really like the opening group B*witched (and still kinda do).
• On the subject of boy bands, the Backstreet Boys are my favorite. I enjoy singing the "Tell me why" part of "I Want It That Way" at karaoke and currently have a Nick Carter haircut now while I wait for it to get longer. In ranking the boy bands, I'd have 98 Degrees next and then 'N Sync.
• The second concert I went to was Creed with my dad. It ruled.
• The third concert I went to was Dave Matthews Band. I've since seen them two more times and are at the top of my favorite live and summer bands. "Crash" was my first cassette tape. "Jagged Little Pill" by Alanis Morissette was my second. For the record, "Californication" was my first cd.
  
• The fourth concert I went to was a trifector curated by the gods: Three Doors Down, Nickleback and Puddle of Mudd.
• As far as 90s pop princesses go, I've got a thing for Mandy Moore. There, I said it.
• I really like American Idol. I remember this performance, this dress, this guy winning instead of Clay and chatting with this contestant on AIM (true story).
• Speaking of American Idol, I think Kelly Clarkson's "Since U Been Gone" is a great song.
• At one point I was really into Savage Garden and I still think of them every time I see/drink Cherry Cola.
  
• I like "MmmBop" by Hanson for the simple fact that it means absolutely nothing and the Hanson brothers will tell you this. I think for a young pop act that takes some guts. Pop music seems to meddle in that boring gray area between songs that mean nothing and songs that have deep metaphorical lyrics.
  
• I know all the words to "Butterfly" by Crazy Town
• Van Halen's "Van Halen" is one of my favorite albums. Does that qualify as a guilty pleasure? I'm not sure.
  
• Other bands I devoted a lot of time to: A.F.I., Coheed and Cambria, the Distillers, Blink 182, the Goo Goo Dolls, Incubus, Jimmy Eat World, Lifehouse, Minus The Bear, Lucero and The Used
  
• I can't get enough of Annie, the Norwegian pop sensation, not the play
• If it's eighties and English I probably love it

There you have it. It feels good to put it all out there. I think that one great contribution bands like The Darkness, Barenaked Ladies and They Might Be Giants brought to popular music was an acceptance to not take music so seriously. We should treat our musical tastes in the same way.